Losing someone you love is hard, and deciding what to do with their ashes after cremation can be difficult, too. The choice is personal and often reflects your special relationship with them. In New Zealand, it’s important to know your options for storing, memorialising, or scattering ashes, and to follow the law.
Many families find comfort in creating a lasting memory to honour their loved one. How you choose to keep or remember the ashes can be influenced by your culture, beliefs, or family traditions. Looking at your options can help you make the right decision for you and your family.
This guide explains different ways to keep ashes at home, bury them, scatter them, or use them in keepsakes. It also covers important legal rules to remember. Thinking about these options carefully can help reduce stress and make sure you choose something respectful and meaningful.
An urn after cremation holds deep meaning and serves as a lasting tribute to a loved one. It provides comfort to family and friends and reflects the unique life being remembered. Thoughtful care in finding the right urn creates a meaningful way to honour their memory.
Considering the variety of materials and designs available can make the process easier. Each option brings its own unique look and character, allowing you to find an urn that truly reflects the personality and values of the person being remembered.
Urns are crafted from different materials that offer unique features and styles. Understanding these options can help you find the perfect way to honour your loved one.
Made from timber such as oak, walnut, or mahogany, wooden urns offer a warm and traditional appearance. Some designs feature detailed carvings, while others have a simple finish. A wooden urn can provide a timeless memorial choice.
Ceramic and glass urns often have a smooth, polished surface. A variety of colours and shapes allows for a more decorative display. Such urns can add a refined touch to a memorial space.
Materials such as brass, stainless steel, or aluminium create a strong and long-lasting container. These urns are often chosen for burial or long-term display. The design can range from simple to intricate patterns.
Natural materials like recycled paper or sand make biodegradable urns suitable for eco-friendly tributes. Over time, the urn naturally returns to the environment. Such designs are ideal for scattering or earth-friendly burials.
A standard urn usually holds the ashes of one adult. Smaller keepsake urns allow the sharing of ashes among several people. Companion urns can store the remains of two individuals together.
Placement plays an important role in selecting an urn. Decorative designs work well in a home or memorial room. Weather-resistant or biodegradable options are better suited for burial or scattering ceremonies.
Many families prefer to keep ashes at home for a sense of comfort and connection. If you choose to do so, it’s important to place the urn somewhere safe and respectful. Ideally, pick a spot that is secure, out of the way of busy areas, and protected from any risks.
Some people keep the urn in a living room, study, or special display cabinet. Others prefer a quieter, more private spot, such as a bedroom or a dedicated memorial space. If you have children or pets, ensure the urn is secure and out of reach to prevent any damage or spillage.
It is also worth thinking about the emotional aspect. While having the ashes nearby can bring comfort, it can also be a constant reminder of your loss. Some people choose to keep them at home for a period before deciding on a more permanent arrangement.
Burial remains a popular option for cremation ashes, as it provides a fixed place for remembrance. You can choose to bury the ashes in a cemetery plot or place them in a columbarium niche.
A full burial involves placing the urn in the ground, often with a headstone or marker. This gives family and friends a physical location to visit and pay respects. Columbarium niches are small spaces, usually within a wall or structure, designed to hold urns. These are often found in cemeteries or memorial gardens.
Some cemeteries allow you to bury ashes in an existing family grave. This can be a cost-effective and meaningful option, keeping loved ones together. Before deciding, check with the cemetery about costs, availability and any rules about the type of urns allowed.
Scattering ashes is a way to honour a loved one by returning them to nature or a place they cared about. Common spots include beaches, rivers, lakes, mountains and gardens. Some families pick locations tied to special memories, while others choose calm places that help bring closure.
In New Zealand, there are rules around scattering ashes. If it is on private land, you need the owner’s permission. For public areas like parks or beaches, you may need approval from the local council or iwi. If the place is culturally significant, it is important to ask local Māori representatives for guidance beforehand.
Many families hold a small ceremony when scattering ashes. This might include readings, music or a moment of silence. Some prefer to scatter all the ashes at once, while others keep some as a keepsake or for another memorial later.
Memorial jewellery allows a small amount of ashes to be included in items such as lockets, rings, or bracelets. This provides a discreet and portable way to keep a loved one close in everyday life. The designs range from simple and understated to more detailed pieces.
Jewellery can be made using glass, resin, or metal to safely hold the ashes. Some people choose to wear the jewellery every day, while others keep it for special occasions or private moments of remembrance. These items can also be passed down through generations as keepsakes.
Besides jewellery, keepsakes like small urns, photo frames, or decorative containers can hold a portion of the ashes. This allows several family members to each have a personal memento. It is a meaningful way to share the connection between those who loved the person.
Eco-friendly memorial options have become more popular among families who wish to reduce environmental impact. Biodegradable urns are designed to break down naturally, often containing seeds or materials that encourage tree growth when buried. This creates a living tribute that continues to grow over time.
Some biodegradable urns are made for water burials, releasing the ashes into the ocean in a controlled and respectful way. These can be a good choice for those who love the sea or have a strong environmental commitment. It is important to select an urn that meets both your environmental values and any legal guidelines.
The choice of an eco-friendly option can bring comfort to families who want the memorial to contribute positively to the environment. Planting a tree or releasing ashes in a natural setting can be a symbolic continuation of life. These tributes can be visited and cared for in the years to come.
Transporting ashes requires careful planning to meet both airline and legal requirements. In most cases, ashes must be carried in a sealed, secure container, accompanied by a cremation certificate. Airlines often require advance notice and may have specific packaging guidelines.
It is recommended to keep ashes in your carry-on luggage rather than checked baggage to reduce the risk of loss or damage. The container should be made of a material that can pass through security scanners. Some countries also have additional entry requirements for bringing in ashes.
Before travelling, contact the airline and research the rules of your destination. This helps avoid delays or complications during your journey. Being well-prepared ensures the process is smooth and respectful.
In New Zealand, there are relatively few legal restrictions on what you can do with cremated ashes. However, permission is required to scatter ashes on private land, and public places may require council or iwi approval. These rules are in place to maintain respect for cultural and environmental values.
Estate laws can also affect who has the right to decide what happens to the ashes. Usually, the executor of the will or the person arranging the funeral has the final say, unless otherwise specified. Disagreements among family members can sometimes arise, so it is helpful to discuss wishes early.
Keeping a clear record of your loved one’s preferences, either in writing or through discussion, can prevent confusion. Following both legal and cultural guidelines ensures the final arrangements are made respectfully. It also protects against disputes or misunderstandings.
Memorial services provide an opportunity for friends and family to gather, remember, and celebrate a life. Including the urn as part of the service can make the occasion more personal.
You may place the urn on a table or pedestal, often surrounded by flowers, candles, and photographs. Some families include readings or music that was meaningful to their loved one. Others invite guests to share stories or place small tokens near the urn as a tribute.
After the service, the ashes can be taken home, buried, or scattered, depending on the family’s wishes. Holding the urn at the service can help bring a sense of closure for those in attendance.
Deciding what to do with cremation ashes is a personal choice, influenced by cultural traditions, religious beliefs, and family values. Some people feel comforted by keeping ashes close, while others prefer to return them to nature.
It is important to take time with the decision and consider your loved one’s wishes. Discussing the options with family can help avoid misunderstandings and ensure everyone feels included.
Understanding New Zealand’s legal requirements ensures that you can carry out your plans respectfully and without difficulty. Whether you choose to keep the ashes at home, bury them, scatter them, or create a memorial, what matters most is that the choice honours your loved one’s memory.
If you need guidance, Bay Cremation Care offers support throughout the process, helping you navigate both practical arrangements and emotional considerations.
At Bay Cremation Care, we are dedicated to providing everyone with options for planning an affordable yet meaningful funeral service at our funeral home in Tauranga.
We are passionate about doing everything we can to give your loved one a beautiful, respectful, memorable farewell and alleviating your pain in this challenging time.
We believe that a funeral plays a vital role in offering closure and catharsis after a loss. That is why we will go out of our way to provide you with caring, attentive service.
Based in the Bay of Plenty, Bay Cremation Care has been offering the people of Tauranga and its surrounding areas compassionate care and support in their most challenging times. The company is run by Alistair Black, a fully qualified Funeral Director, Embalmer and member of the Funeral Directors Association of New Zealand (FDANZ) and NZ Embalmers Association.
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